Saturday, April 23, 2005

Seeing you for the 1st Time

World Book Day...
Today is World Book Day. I woke up rather early for a weekend and decided to read my Chronicles of Narnia... its addictive I have to say *grin*, so far I have only gotten to chapter 4 for the first book as there were things that i had to do... and yes it was important... wouldn't part with the book if it wasn't. Anyways, the Possum brought me to a movie 'The Jacket' in 1Utama and to do "coupley things" today like going to Starbucks and we ended up later with a bottle of Black Label in RSC. Also he got me book since it was World Book Day. I now have the whole set of "The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy"... Ahhh... books glorious books. Going to get 2 more before the end of the month which makes me break all my so called 'rules' of not buying any more books... hehehe... oh well, books are just wonderful. If you want to borrow any books, call me, aight?

Finally We Are Face to Face
I love the view from here!

A strange happened today whilst the Possum and I were at RSC. For once in our lives we were honest with each other. It was difficult to swallow some of the things that we said to one another yet at the same time it was reassuring in its own way. Tonight we opened ourselves up and showed our true selves for once in our whole relationship.

For those of you who know me well, you would know that I have entertained the idea of a breakup with the Possum, but never really materialized because honestly I couldn't. I loved him to much that regardless of what stunt he pulled or whatever happened, I knew why and what would happen. Its scary but I can predict everything that happens in his life and I understand the things he does and why he does them and I accept them because I know the whole logic behind it. It may seem strange for some of you, and you may not understand... don’t' blame you all for that too... you just have to be me for awhile and you will know.

I know now that I truly love this Possum. Putting up with ones shite is hard but actually understanding it is a whole different story. Some of you might think that I am just settling for less, or I am just 'accepting' things and have this blindfold over my eyes, but you just need to know what I know and feel the things that I feel.

From the whole conversation that night, I realized that the Possum and I are more alike that I let on and this is something that is not planned nor is it forced "sameness". On the surface we are as different as night and day (even our skin colour is such); the thing is you don't need to dig deep to see that we are almost the same. We are both from different poles in the world, one north and one south, yet we both are connected, there is a straight line in between us and we meet at many points... that’s me and the Possum. I need him and he needs me too and even though there will no doubt be more times in the future when we both feel like calling it quits, we would still hold on.

The future and life is very big from where I stand... I feel so small. I am afraid of what life will throw at me and I am not sure what will happen. We might breakup one day or we might even go the distance, but right now with him at my side, I feel better... I feel as if I am not alone. To love and to be loved is a wonderful feeling, but to love and be face to face, heart to heart and soul to soul with the one you love is even better.

* I Love You Possum Raccoon Boy *

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