Wednesday, September 15, 2004

Deflated, Disheartened, Disconsolate, Discontent and Dispirited

Deflated, Disheartened, Disconsolate, Discontent, Dispirited

Deflated, Disheartened, Disconsolate, Discontent and Dispirited

Deflated, Disheartened, Disconsolate, Discontent and Dispirited

Deflated, Disheartened, Disconsolate, Discontent and Dispirited

Deflated, Disheartened, Disconsolate, Discontent and Dispirited

Yeah thats how I feel at the moment on this brightly lit afternoon. The blazing disk in the sky only adds to the blatant Deflated, Disheartened, Disconsolate, Discontent and Dispirited feelings in me. I am not sure why I am feeling this way yet again. Thought I was over this phase. I guess NOT! Shitters..

I wonder what happened to me? Wasn't I the little fairy that danced and laughed whenever she wanted? Was I not the childish lighthearted one? Wasn't I the one that loved to smile and to make others smile in return? Who cracked jokes which werenn't funny but made others laugh just cos? Why am I just so restless and Deflated, Disheartened, Disconsolate, Discontent and Dispirited now? Is this the process of growing up? Because if this is, that I don't really want to grow up.

Deflated, Disheartened, Disconsolate, Discontent and Dispirited. I just want to go back into Popiah mode. I feel so overdressed and stupid at the moment. I feel like discarding all my clothes and burning everything I own. Everything that bonds me and has a hold on me, that way I have nothing to live for and can leave as and when I want? yeah.. I think things would be simpler than.

* The Deflated, Disheartened, Disconsolate, Discontent and Dispirited DreamWeaver goes to light a match but can't find any. Her lighter has also run out of freakin gas.. *sigh*
"Bugger," she says and goes to her room to mope under the covers..


Shostakovitch - Rieu, Andre - The Second Waltz Plays in the background and DreamWeaver imagines herself during the Renaissance dancing in a ridiculous gown which resembles lacy curtains and heavy drapes with gordy tassles.. She spins round and round and round till her head spins and she is not feeling Deflated, Disheartened, Disconsolate, Discontent and Dispirited anymore. She just feels the world spinning and spinning and she feels the tummy churning and churning like milk being turned into cheese. DreamWeaver trips over the revoltingly hideous gown, as she is a clumsy person and curls up in a Popiah and sleeps on the cool marble floor.. she is now a Popiah in a gown.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Dear Dreamweaver,

Don't worry that you may not be smiling as you once did. There comes a time in anyones life that they'd feel Deflated, Disheartened, Disconsolate, Discontent and Dispirited. It's only human to feel that way every now and then. Whatmore if you really are bothered by something. So don't worry Dreamweaver because whatever you're feeling, for whatever the reason, it's perfectly normal. And since you've been the one to lighten peoples hearts this is the time where you get some in return, as in someone else to lighten your spirits.
Sometimes you wish that whatever it is that's bothering you would just disappear. Unfortunately, sometimes, it takes time, sometimes it takes a long time. And before you know it, you're back to your good old self with your worries farfar behind you. Patience may not be one of your best virtues but trust me, just be a little more patient.
I hope to see you soon Dreamweaver, hope the night has better things in store for you than what the day had.

Angelus

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