What I wanted to say

I have not packed.

I am tired.

My momentary fix and the euphoria has vanished

and as predicted and as always I feel depressed,

sad, bitter, angry and lonely.

I had the urge to call you and talk to you,

but we haven't been talking for awhile now...

and just at that moment,

I had so many things I wanted to say to you...

fragments of memories that I remembered about you and I

but I didn't call and of course, neither did you.

I don't feel well.

I am scared.

I hope its just me being silly.

I hate suppliers sometimes.

I hate the dumb ass ppl that I have to work with.

I am going crazy just waiting for freaking artwork at 2:30am.

I hate hoaxes.

I hate imposed guilt trips.

I horribly dislike it when ppl command me to do things.

I miss my granny.

I wish she was still alive.

I miss my other grandparents.

I wish they were alive too.

I wish you were here.

You could always make me feel better...

or at least you tried your very best to make me feel better.

Today.

Today, things will change for the better.