.....

.... am still at the office.

pulling several 11pm'ers in a row ain't fun...

and you aren't helping me really *sniff sniff*

Office Rambles

It's lunchtime on Tuesday and I just finished eating my sandwich. Today is 'lets-catch-up-with-newspaper-reading-and-lets-eat-in' day. Two papers are left to be read, so I thought I would give myself a treat (?) and blog (treats to myself as you can tell aren't all that super at the mo!)

Well, the last couple of days have been busy and packed to the brim with work and going-outs. Last Friday saw me leaving the office at the all time earliest - 4:58pm!! It was for SumYe's wedding. I nearly wept for joy when I saw her looking so radiant in her white gown. Again allow me to reminisce about the days when we were younger

*sighs happily and a little nostalgically*

The wedding dinner was delish (we had lobster, prawns, roasted pith - hehehe) and I met an old friend who talked about my poems... poems which I no longer write... It was good to be reminded though, about the bits and pieces of the old 'me'... the one I see occasionally, the 'me' that had the heart of the funfair, the one that was... just different.

This past week at the office sees me not really hanging out with JT or JO but rather with LW. LW is a ching-chong gentleman. We hungout on Saturday and during lunch or after office hours. It's interesting to see his perspective of things, to learn about him and to learn about the people in the bank... and while he spoke, I couldn't help but be envious of him especially when he talks about all the goals that he has set for himself. However, he like me is lost in his own way...

I reckon that is what everyone goes through every now and then ~ a phase of being lost... Of being unsure about what they want and where they are heading or what they are doing. Suddednly your old way of doing and living seems alien to you and you adopt a 'new' way of being, of thinking and of seeing the world and people around you.

I wonder though at times why people behave the way they do. Why people once so close to you seem to drift furthur away without explanations or reason... why they don't talk about it or try to mend things, but just leave things torn, broken and well, just plain confusing. It's quite crappy when you get used to things and it stops... you miss the emails, SMS's, calls and lunches... you miss being called 'Princess' or those 1001 other endearments... but I guess just like many other things in life, some answers are just elusive...

Ahhh... the clock ticks again and its back to work for me... hope that all of you have a good week ahead. I will definitely try to have a good week, with me hoefully spending lesser time at the office... but you know something odd...

I kinda like it here... (I make retract this statement in awhile!)

The Lamp of Wisdom

From within them, the lamp of wisdom will come alight,

and dispel darkness from their lives...
- Bhagavad Gita -

~*~*~*~

I can't wait for the lamp of wisdom to come alight in me.

Then I wouldn't have so much darkness around me...

I wonder how long I would have to wait though...

I pray that it isn't that long ~ *sniff sniff*

*Dream Weaver* works in a bank

As always, the days blend one into another and I find myself bewildered and yes, very much bothered that there hardly is time to do the things that I really really want to do. I am either too tired or find myself having to do other mundane things which are necessary.

For those if you loyal readers who still have no clue that I am now working in a bank (Gasp! Shock! Horror!) now you know *grin grin* When most people see me and enquire about what I am doing now after my last job at the hovel, they tend to gasp and a look of disbelief creeps on their faces, for *Dream Weaver* and banks, don’t quite seem to gel.

To perfectly honest, I would never ever have thought that I would be working in a bank and by the looks of my friends faces, they thought the same. But what criteria should a person have for working in a bank? Are there certain traits that they need to have? A certain kind of look or standard? I have no idea really… all I know is that I, *Dream Weaver* now works in a bank.

A friend also asked if I was happy working in the bank. I am still pondering about this... about me being happy working in the bank and so far, I don’t know if I am happy or not. I have made some friends now, just a handful things are looking up. The work is challenging and I am still learning about the different processes and the other blah blah blah’s of a bank. So am I happy? I guess in my own little way I am.

I miss the sunshine in the evenings though. I miss having time in the nights to read, sift though my magazines for arts and crafts ideas and going out with Sunshine and my other friends for drinks after work. Now, I am too tired and just fall into bed when I get home at about 10.30ish. Will try my hardest to leave work earlier in the days to come.

However, I am thankful though for many things these past few weeks.

Things that *Dream Weaver* is thankful for…

* Sunshine and his boundless patience. For his lifts almost daily from the bank to my home. For SMS’s and calls to cheer me up and spur me on day after day. Thanks Da!

* My mum who prepares my meals everyday.

* My dad who sends me to work everyday – I dread the day when I have to start taking the LRT everyday.

* For my family who listen to my stories about the bank and my new friends with glee and who are my backbone these days ~ much thanks.

* JT who has been an absolute Angel these past two weeks and who has befriended me and introduced me to other colleagues in the bank. Thanks for the SMS’s during training and the emails that make me laugh.

* JO and his jokes, sarcasm and infectious smile and laughter. Thanks for trying to get me out of the office, for giving me that one crazy night of clubbing, for promising me more fun nights and for being a decently delightful chaperone.

* RA for having dinners with me and being a friend. For explaining the hierarchy in the office and for opening my eyes to certain things that I would otherwise have taken awhile to see. It’s strange how we never really spoke in school but I guess we are making up for lost time now.

* For JL who is a chatterbox and an absoulte fashionista. Who explains things to me again and again and commiserates with me when idiots come a-knockin’. May there be more laughs and stories for us to share in the near future.

* To B for lucnhes and for that 3am supper on Friday night, reminiscent of those good old days when we younger and more carefree *smile*

* To the other friends who leave me MSG’s on facebook, MSN and friendster or who send SMS’s to enquire about me and to just say “hello” much thanks. It’s the little things such as these that make the days seem that much brighter.

I pray that all of you have a fantastic week ahead.

Take care and God bless all of you and may Angels watch over all of you.

P.S: I can’t believe that Christmas is just around the corner *smile smile* I can’t wait!!!

Just when...

Just when I thought I understood...

Just when I thought I knew...

Just when I had my hopes up...

I realised that I didn't understand...

I realised that I didn't know...

I realised that hope floats...

but at times it floats away from you...

crazy week...

It has been a crazy week...

A week of many "firsts"...

I am tired...

Though to be honest, I am feeling a little worried,

mixed with a dash of sadness, a litre of happiness,

a tablespoon of tiredness, a pinch of joy, a splash of excitement...

I think I need sleep...

I have been tagged!

I have been tagged by Avina *smiles*

a) Link to the person that tagged you and post the rules on your blog.

b) Share 7 random and/or weird facts about yourself (on your blog, we all want to know them).

c) Tag 7 random people at the end of your post and include links to their blogs.

d) Let each person know that they’ve been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

~*~*~*~

7 random / wierd facts about *DreamWeaver*

1.) I can burp at will

*BURP*

2.) I don't mind washing plates

It's brainless work really...

3.) I believe that Angels exist

4.) I like onion rings and onion soup but will not eat the onions by itself

5.) There are three voices inside my head.

The negative, the positive and the one that sits on the wall.

I usually have conversations with them when I am bored

6.) When I don't have conversations with the voices inside my head,

I talk to myself

7.) I don't have a favourite colour...

Every colour is special in its own way

~*~*~*~

I now tag the following people:

Peggy

BryBry

Pinky

Annie

Kimberly Vanilla

Lisha

Eric Yong

I miss the beach!

~ I miss the beach! ~

arghhhhh!

Its the weekend and I planned to do tons of things but as usual nothing quite turned out the way it was supposed to and in some ways I am to be blamed yet I hate this. I hate not having things go according to plan. I am now 2.25 hours behind schedule and my hair is not cooperating with me. *sigh sigh sigh* I wish I could just crawl back into bed and turn back the hands of time till last night when I got home... but alas... I am still here 2.26 hours behind time.

AAAAARRRGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

*I hate feeling frustrated as it wastes my energy but at times like this.... arghhhhh!*