Friday, July 09, 2010

It still creeps up on me

The past sometimes creeps up on you when you least expect it to. Like when you are having a pretty relaxing day at work and you decide to go on FB and then see photos of someone else's past which is related to your past and then you get upset and then you start becoming that person you hate, the one that is insecure, the one that feels 10inches small, the one that is ugly and fat and useless, the one that questions the relationship, that wonders if this is true, that this is right, that this is real and not some second hand prize he is accepting... I still get these thoughts... it still creeps up on me...

It's just that sometimes especially during low moments, you wonder.

I am hoping the past just stays where it belongs.

I should know better... but I am human.

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