Friday, April 29, 2005
Ahhh... the horrible, stressful week is over. Finally!!!
The excitement in me has been building since I knew that I was going to Singapore and eventhough my parents can't make it, luckily Possum decided to go ahead with our plans. *Phew* So it would be and the Possum in Singapore Part 2. *smiles*
The photo is of me in one of the cafes on Orchard Road drinking a ice blended peppermint mocha... it was Yummm...
Did I tell you that I really like the city? Well I do...
Just got home from Peggys house to borrow books to read for the trip. Thanks Pegs... *hugs* you have to teach me how you wrap the books so neatly, yeah!
Hahaha... no more assignments to think about for about 4 days... hoorah!!!
To the malats, have a safe and happy trip in Camerons yeah?
Singapore here I come!!!
I was trying to be optimistic and it was easy with G around. We had fun talking (just like old times) about contradictions in one's life and etc. Went to see YN and Vic at Federal Autos and then shot to Megamall. I noticed that the big drain outside Federal Autos smelt like Port Dickson... hehehe... At megamall G and I shopped. He bought stuff for the Camerons trip and I felt sad that I wasn't going to be there as I bet they are going to have a good time there... but I think mine will be better in Singapore... heheheh * grin * Oh... bought a night shirt with fairies and silver glittery *stars* on it as well as 'Crazy Fairy' written all over it... (so me!)
Still feeling upset about the results, but I gues there is nothing to do... but this sure does dishearten me. Well, I suppose theres always the next assignments - the horror! the horror!
Going to feed my Esio Trots now, bought the crab sticks... they are in for a treat. See yous...
Thursday, April 28, 2005
* Phew * What a relief the day is over. Today has been like an emotional rollercoaster (but its been happening a lot – so I guess it is expected) but today was the MAJOR twistery type which has the potential to make you hurl and wish you had never sat on the damn thing in the first place.
Right… what happened? Well the day started of well and I went for tutorials and was just thinking that I could take the 3 odd hours left to go blog something and reply those emails when… TAP! TAP! went the window of the little office we were sitting in. Thr door opens and W pokes his head and says…
“You got my email?”
“NO!” I say… “Why?”
“Oh… uhhh” (he stammers and shifts from right foot to left foot)
“Urmmm… uhhh… you are Barred from Social Psych!”
At this point I wanted to just smack him but then when I heard that my heart stopped beating for awhile as the words sunk in. BARRED! I am barred… All the while as the thoughts sank in my mind, W was going on and on about how he had sent it and he said the Stamford server was down and I must have not got it and etc.
F%&# couldn’t he have called to make sure I knew?
W proceeds to tell me that I can appeal. I have to get “valid” documentation before 2pm (time of my paper!) and then I can sit for the bloody paper. So I start panicking cos I obviously don’t have any documentation. So I go online and try to find AWAM’s number as I skipped one class to go for that camp last month so I thought they could email me something as proof… instead I came upon my first Angel… G. G said he would come and pick me up and send me home so I could search for “valid” documentation. So, home I went.
At home I hastily searched for something and found nothing (Story of my life!) … just an agenda for the day which was the only thing I had. So I proceeded to type a letter of appeal (at this point I was still scared – my folks would kill me if they knew I was barred!). While I was typing and cracking my head for something decent to right, I spoke to Tiny on MSN. He was so consoling and kind, reminding me that the sun would shine again and everything would be over in the end.
The Possum than called and I proceeded to tell him the news, whilst hysterically typing. He asked me to send him the finished letter (he is good with formal letters!) and he checked it and then emailed it back to me with the amendments. He then gave me some advice, wished me luck and gave me some kisses to sustain me on the journey.
At college, I rushed up to the office only to see Thomas there. I had tried calling Thomas as he knew about appeals and the like having been doing it since his first sem. He asked me what I was doing there and I said I got barred. He had a jolly laugh about it all the while saying “You got barred! OH my gawd!” I proceeded to give the letter to the person in charge and waited for the verdict. She came out with the letters in the hand and said
“This things are not valid enough. Cannotlah!”
My heart stopped again… I looked as if I wanted to cry… I could feel the freaking tears welling up behind my eyelids. She must have seen that look, and then hastily said… “Kiddinglah! You can sit for your exam!” I felt relived and yet tired at the same time. But really THANK GOD… it was ok. I took the exam and finished it and met Thomas for a drink. We went to Starbucks and had a good long chat. After that, I went to TIMES bookshop and I bought 3 books. * Shakes head * I know… I tried… but they were on 25% off. That’s like huge! Anyways, yeah… so I went home and felt relieved.
The rest of the day saw me trying to finish my assignments though some really uncooperative people are making it really hard for me to do so. (blasted people really!) So, I had to think up new ways to do my work which is not easy as something’s cannot be faked and etc. Hard to explainlah! Anyways, went to the Possums house later in the night and watched “Guess Who!” and played Zuma. I LOVE the game.
Anyways, its like 2.39am and I have yet to start on my work. Tomorrow is going to be a long day. To the Angels of today, G, Tiny, Possum and Thomas… thank you all for all the help you have given me. Without you guys, it would have been a shittier more horrible day. *Hugs* Thanks again...
Tiny, I can see the sunshine... *smiles*
Tuesday, April 26, 2005
Bang! Bang! Goes my bed room door and the voice of my dad going
“YOU not sleeping yet ah? Crazy ahh?”
I reply “Yeah Crazy!”
But he can’t hear me for he has gone back to his room, back to his slumber.
Its late… almost 4am. I should be asleep (Ahhh… those ‘should be’s again!) as I have class tomorrow but I decided to stay up and get some work off my chest. Besides I think the roti canai and the teh ais limau, milo ais and porridge is keeping me awake. Now with almost half my work completed, I can look forward to the weekend which is the long labour day weekend. Hoorah!
Most of the malat peeps will be on their way to Camerons with the cool weather, the awesome yummy strawberries, fresh produce and beautiful flowers and I will be going across the border to Singapore. Haven’t planned out the whole trip yet, though it will include Serangoon Rangoon Road for Bak Kut Teh, which I have been craving for since November last year – total yums yums!!! Then there will be the hunt for Suzy’s Zoo and to stock up for scrapbooking supplies. Any orders anyone?
I can’t wait to go to Sinagpore again. Ahhh… the joy of it all. Hopefully this time it wouldn’t rain and we will get to perhaps have dessert at the promenade or have drinks at one of the trendier shops. A part of me though longs to go with the peeps up the hill, but I guess I have to miss out on it this time. Hopefully they will understand and not exclude me from their ritual mamak sessions and other outings (Hint! Hint!)
But before I even get to the weekend I have all this work to do… haih! Oh well, that’s life for you I suppose. Drudgery and working away and then fun fun fun! I would dearly love to sit with my laptop and a cup of coffee or tea and type long emails to my friends and if I have more time, a hand written letters which I haven’t done in a long time.
The damn mozzie is flitting around me, teasing me and mocking me. I hope to kill it before I sleep. Call me barbaric but they are just sickening things. Yeah I am crazy for wanting to kill those buggers but then again who loves them mozzies?
Well will write more when I can and for those that I owe emails to, 1001 apologies. Will be filling your inbox’s shortly.
Saturday, April 23, 2005
World Book Day...
Today is World Book Day. I woke up rather early for a weekend and decided to read my Chronicles of Narnia... its addictive I have to say *grin*, so far I have only gotten to chapter 4 for the first book as there were things that i had to do... and yes it was important... wouldn't part with the book if it wasn't. Anyways, the Possum brought me to a movie 'The Jacket' in 1Utama and to do "coupley things" today like going to Starbucks and we ended up later with a bottle of Black Label in RSC. Also he got me book since it was World Book Day. I now have the whole set of "The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy"... Ahhh... books glorious books. Going to get 2 more before the end of the month which makes me break all my so called 'rules' of not buying any more books... hehehe... oh well, books are just wonderful. If you want to borrow any books, call me, aight?
Finally We Are Face to Face
I love the view from here!
A strange happened today whilst the Possum and I were at RSC. For once in our lives we were honest with each other. It was difficult to swallow some of the things that we said to one another yet at the same time it was reassuring in its own way. Tonight we opened ourselves up and showed our true selves for once in our whole relationship.
For those of you who know me well, you would know that I have entertained the idea of a breakup with the Possum, but never really materialized because honestly I couldn't. I loved him to much that regardless of what stunt he pulled or whatever happened, I knew why and what would happen. Its scary but I can predict everything that happens in his life and I understand the things he does and why he does them and I accept them because I know the whole logic behind it. It may seem strange for some of you, and you may not understand... don’t' blame you all for that too... you just have to be me for awhile and you will know.
I know now that I truly love this Possum. Putting up with ones shite is hard but actually understanding it is a whole different story. Some of you might think that I am just settling for less, or I am just 'accepting' things and have this blindfold over my eyes, but you just need to know what I know and feel the things that I feel.
From the whole conversation that night, I realized that the Possum and I are more alike that I let on and this is something that is not planned nor is it forced "sameness". On the surface we are as different as night and day (even our skin colour is such); the thing is you don't need to dig deep to see that we are almost the same. We are both from different poles in the world, one north and one south, yet we both are connected, there is a straight line in between us and we meet at many points... that’s me and the Possum. I need him and he needs me too and even though there will no doubt be more times in the future when we both feel like calling it quits, we would still hold on.
The future and life is very big from where I stand... I feel so small. I am afraid of what life will throw at me and I am not sure what will happen. We might breakup one day or we might even go the distance, but right now with him at my side, I feel better... I feel as if I am not alone. To love and to be loved is a wonderful feeling, but to love and be face to face, heart to heart and soul to soul with the one you love is even better.
* I Love You Possum Raccoon Boy *
Friday, April 22, 2005
- I might be barred from my social psych paper due to poor attendance.
- I might get really shitty grades as I have not studied (don't really care actually!)
- I don't know if I can finish all my assignments on time!
- I don't feel really motivated to do anything.
- I know what I want but I don't know how to get it.
- I know what I don't want and I can't get rid of the things that I dont' want.
- I have a back problem and am afriad of seeing the doc.
There are many other problems which seem to silly to mention. Actually, they are silly... you might think it is silly and I may well think that yours are silly too. Well yeah... so it goes...
"Success doesn't mean the absense of failures; it means the attainment of ultimate objectives. It means winning the war, not every battle." - Edwin C. Bliss
What are my ultimate objectives? I don't really know myself. I am the sort of person who wants to win every battle and with each battle that I undertake I kill bits of myself. So, in the end if I do win the war, would it have been a worthwhile thing? Would I enjoy what I have worked and fought for or would it just be something... another trophy on the shelf, another certificate on the wall or just pride in my heart.
I am confused these days. No one seems to understand and I doubt that they can. Calling friends doesn't really help for they dont' understand. SMSed a person a couple of times, I thought that person would understand, but that person has his/her own battles to fight and I have no presence in his life.
What gets me through the day? I am not sure. I guess seeing my things, feeling like I did something right or perhaps made someone happy even at my own expense is enough ... for now. But I am not sure how long this will last.
"Push me and see how far I can go."
The little girl said this to her mum. So her mum pushed her hard on the swings. She swung high up in the air and she thought she could touch the branches of the trees. She was frightened, but that melted away when she felt the thrill and rush of the wind. She felt that she could fly... she didn't fall. She was free for awhile.
I need to find out what my ultimate objectives are. I am still sailing unsure of where I am going. It seems to others that I have everything sorted out well... but alas if they only knew this befuddled brain and this weeping heart inside. Maybe they do see it all, they are just afriad to see it and tell me so. Going to go look for them ultimate objectives... anyone know the way?
Wednesday, April 20, 2005
Sing me song
Write me a sonnet
Make music on the gong
Sway me around
Cook me a meal
Send me a rose
Show me what’s real
Lift up my mask
Dry up my tears
Give me a smile
Drive away my fears
Save me my prince
Slay dragons all around
Kiss me on my lips
Sweep me of the ground
Please come rescue me
The time is a ticking
Patiently I have been waiting
For a fairy tale ending
Tuesday, April 19, 2005
This is just sad... really sad... I have had no time to blog.
I have written several posts which are all waiting in the laptop to be posted and I have no time. *sniff* I miss my writing... the real sort of writing... not the idiotic Attitude Inoculation theory type thingys... arghhh...
OK... have to focus... only 9 more to go... only 9 more to go... only 9 more to go...
*I incidentally look like this dear old bunny rabbit... bad hair and feeling super manja...
Monday, April 18, 2005
Stay another day
There are a million things we have to do
There are a million things I have to stay
You will take the sun away
The thunder, lightning and the rain
Will lash at my window every single day
You promised you would never leave
Were those just empty promises
Dreams with holes you weaved
Why did you go?
Didn’t you hear me pray
Just come back for one more day
I just want everything to be okay
And I felt so miserable, tired and old
My world was just a dull awful grey
A place which was harsh and cold
No one seemed to bother or care
To breakaway and start anew I did not dare
And then suddenly there you were
A hand outstretched to help
A sight which is so uniquely rare
You held my hand and said to me
Don’t worry; everything’s going to be okay
It’s a glorious wonderful day outside
Why don’t we go out and play?
So I left the heartache
The disappointments and the tears
I embraced the simple joys and happiness
And discarded all my worries and fears.
It was then you taught me how to laugh despite the pain
You reminded me that every rainbow needs the rain
That serene smile from you really brightened my day
A sparkling beam from Heaven,
You my dear sunny ray
Then as I learnt to stand alone again
You told me you had to leave
Your work is done you say
“Goodbye” I will see you another day
Tears started to form when I saw you leave
And suddenly I began to remember
My sadness, strife, hurts and grief
But you touched my heart
And reminded me once more
That even though you are not with me
In my heart is where you will stay forevermore
I know that it’s true the words you have said
I have to face the real world again
So I wipe the tears away
And watch as you leave
My glittering beam from Heaven,
My dear sunny ray
I will not fear for I will see you again someday
Sunday, April 17, 2005
This makes me think about all the “should be’s” that I should be doing.
I should be thinner. I should be smarter. I should be more ladylike. I should be more IT savvy. I should love math. I should be an actress. I should help the poor. I should be able to save the world. I should write a book. I should be richer. I should be…I should be… I should be… Gawd there are many of those “Should be’s” huh?
Time passes by and all the “should be’s” just pass by and you can’t ever get them back. They are just thoughts and perhaps wishful thinking of someone who means to do well. Who shoots for the stars and ends up somewhere close to the pavement, hahaha…
I really should be spending my time writing more productive things really instead of moaning all the time… oh well… atleast I feel alittle better...
Saturday, April 16, 2005
When I feel like a mug
A mug with a hole in the bottom
No matter how much you pour into me
I will never be full
You could try patching me up
But it will do no good whatsoever
For the broken piece
Is the only piece that could ever make me whole
But that piece is gone for good
That fragment that would complete me
Has disappeared and vanished
Like the mist in the morning
At times there is a piece
Which looks as if it might fit
But when tested
Proves to be yet another phony
So I still seek
To find that one solitary shard
Which would end my emptiness
Which would fill me
And make me whole again
I just finished an assignment today, a critique of a newspaper layout and design (please don’t roll your eyes – its not as easy as it sounds) and I only have 4 social psychology assignments, my social psych final and 5 more PR assignments to go before I am done with this semester. Hoorah!!! (I am trying to sound optimistic here but am not doing a good job of it, well…at least I tried.)
After getting caught in a storm and walking, rising a bus and than a cab and getting half my jeans and feet wet, I finally reached college. Handed up that assignment and headed of to 1Utama for an adventure. Wanted to catch a movie but ended up having tea with Eric which was really nice as we hadn’t talked to each other in awhile. He showed me his book which was just awesome. Puts my book to shame *blush*… anyways we had a pleasant talk about books, our lives and future projects which we wanted to do. Talking with people like Eric, make me feel normal and like I am not as crazy as I sound. He gives me hope and encourages me to follow my dreams which many of my friends don’t. Heck, they don’t even know about it let alone encourage me… so called friends that they are.
Well after 1Utama, I wasted a whole night with Possum. I shouldn’t be saying stuff like that, but really it was a wasted night. I have had a really busy week, and I should have just spent about 2 hours with him and nothing more. Too much of someone can piss you off especially if they can’t keep their mouths shut! Sorry I am being mean here, but it’s true. I guess I wanted my own time to do my own things and then I thought about him and how he was at the factory the half the week and etc. and than… hmmm… another wasted night.
9 more to go… I don’t know how I am going to get through this, but somehow I will have to and I know I will. Bloody optimism!!! Ahh well… I should be (another “should be”), going off to bed now. Am tired physically, emotionally and mentally… ahhh… nice comfy bed. Thank you Lord for these small pleasures!!!
p.s: 11 more to go if you count the 2 club reviews…* sigh* (i am not in the mood for colours)
Wednesday, April 13, 2005
While I walked to get the bus, I started pondering about life and its little wierdness and wonders. Eventhough the sun was blazing, I was thankful that I could feel the rays of the sun and its warmth. I was thankful that I could walk whilst some people didn't have any legs. Then I began to think of all the things that I have been taking for granted like the ability to think, to breathe and to talk. The ability to laugh, to smile and to write.
I then thought of all the material things I had which honestly was not important and which not many people had. I thought of my house and eventhough its old and small and eventhough I wished hard last time for a bigger better place, I would not trade my house for anything. For my house is special as it is filled with love and laughter. It is not a house really, it is a home. There were other out there that has no where to live and no place to lay their head. Those who didn't know what "Suzy's Zoo", "Forever Friends" and "Little Ponies" were, and I felt sorry for them that they would never have this little things which were meaningless but full of little joys... but maybe they are happier not knowing it in some ways.
Needless to say it was one long walk with much pondering about a whole host of other things. When I reached the bus stop, I sat down and thought somemore whilst I ate the curry puffs and kept a vigilant look out for the bus. Now hours later, I am still thinking and pondering as I sit here in the computer lab listening to my current fav song "Breakaway" whilst Elliot keeps me company and hums along with me. I have an hour of class later and I will then take the bus home again and continue my assignment. Then I will go to The Loft and review it whilst celebrating my friends birthday with my colleagues and the Possum. Hoping that everything goes well and even if it doesn't it will only serve as a reminder that I am not perfect and that nothing is, which is alright... I am human after all. Actually I am a blessed human *Amen*
*Dream Weaver* starts to hum with Elliot who is doing the famous chicken wiggle and monkey finale. Anyone interested in learning??? *wink wink*
Sunday, April 10, 2005
Listening now to: Sweet Child of Mine by Guns and Roses
Feeling: Its a mixture of wanting to hurt someone and to sky-dive
SINCE someone has said that this blog is too colourful, this entry will be in the standard black,(are you happy now EMPTY INBOX?) besides today is so NOT a pink day!!! The day started of with me running down avoiding the moutain of work in my room and eating my lunch. I wrote of the events of the day before and it made me feel happy and fuzzy that I had such a good time the night before. Well after some procrastination and runnign away from the mountain of work, I decided that I would actually try and finish all the work that was sitting there calling me with thier mocking voices (reminds me of the vile custard bun!).
So, I gathered all my books and stuff and headed down once more to the computer room all the while ignoring the books which muttered under their breathes "About time you completed us!". I heard them muttering and grumbling and I smacked them down hard on the table for good measure. They were instantly silent. Thus began my day of sitting in front of the computer typing and thinking and typing and deleting and thinking and typing and deleting and typing and finally printing.
During the course of the day, I did nothing but work only stopping for breaks to the toilet and for food. I recieved no calls and made one and it was a mistake for it ruined my whole day. I shouldn't have dialed your number, should have just put you aside neatly in my mind. I wish I could turn back the time so that my heart need not have been torn and broken by you. Today is the day where I see you as who you really are in all your awful shades of colours. I thought you were different, why didn't I see you as you were?
My torn heart is bleeding but I don't feel a thing... in fact I feel strangely calm and content. Sure there is this nagging voice of me which tells me to not be too hasty, to give you another chance... but I push that nagging voice, that voice which always is hopeful aside and I indulge in myself for once in the anger and the hate which strangely does not come to me... instead it is just calmness I feel. Maybe I have just been harbouring too much anger in me all this time, that there is no more room for you.
There are so many things that I want to see you. I have scripted my whole speech in my head with careful precision but I know that when I see you or hear from you, I will not be able to utter a single word of it. One part of me want to end this already fragile friendship we have yet that sickeningly hopeful part of me is telling me to give you yet another chance at this friendship which we have built from scratch.
I have been typing for a good ten hours or so now and I am so tired and sleepy, yet there is this need for me to pen down how I feel before I sleep so that my heart can be at rest and I finally have some peace. My assignment for subject PRL2000 is completed and needs binding and my articles excluding the bar review have also been summitted. Ahhh... I managed to do it and I feel relieved. Another burden of my back... yet there in the horizon are a couple more to go, but I know now that whatever comes my way I can take it... I got my freaking groove (although it is a limp and a wriggle) back, so I should be able to do it.
As for you the one who tore my heart, if you read this post... where do we go now??? And of course, thanks for making me feel this way - you deserve a freaking award and since people are afraid of me cussing on my on blog, I will refrain from doing it! (see Gazza, I am tyring to stop cussing!)
May tomorrow see a very Pink Sunday with wonderful sunrises and sunsets and may this anger and hurt in me diminish......
Saturday, April 09, 2005
So yeah... I shouldn't be blogging right now, but I just had to write about yesterday. Well the morning was pretty dull and the afternoon saw me frantically doing this stupid stupid assignment (which I have yet to put the finishing touches on...) and as for the evening and night, thats when the fun began. The Possum picked me up and we headed to 1Utama for pasta at Italiannis. We had to wait awhile for all our friends to get there and when everyone finally arrived (there were 6 of us), we started to order our meal.
The Yum Yum food started arriving. I had the Classic Cabonara and a Fuzzy Navel and a couple of red wines (the waiter was surprisingly attentive to our needs - nice fellow). After the meal, during which we laughed a lot and talked about alot of stuff, namely our friend Rina (only good things dear) and laughed some more. The three of us, the Possum, myself and TT were made to stand on the chairs whilst the Italianis crew sang their rendition of Happy Birthdays to us and yeah... we all laughed some more. Now that I think of it I am not sure what was so amusing... hehehe...
Then came the 3 slices of Cheesecake with Strawberry Sauce which was FREE and of course was yum yum. They were huge slices and I and the Possum couldnt' finish our cake and whats more, Nic decided to order a slice of Tiramisu as it came highly recommended by Rina. So there we sat eating cake and drinking wine, talking and lauging somemore and it came as no surprise that we were the 2nd last table to pay the bill and leave (it was a Whopping BIG bill) but we didn't care and were happily snapping photos all the way to our cars, along with more laughter (big surprise there!) Had to keep deleting my photos as there was not enough memory on my camera but soon... soon, I will post them pics. (Crosses fingers behind back.)
After 1Utama, we piled into the Possums car and headed down to Waikiki which is my all time favorite place to go (Possum rolls his eyes), though no one understands why. We managed to get a good view of the dance floor and of Bala, the lil sexy indian man who sings real good. =) Yeah, he is the main reason why I just love Waikiki. Anyways, there we all were sitting around the table and singing along with the songs and having a jolly good time, laughing. At a particular Bonnie M song (Brown Girl in the Rain), I decide to sing along as well. It just so happened that I went alittle too soprana and alittle too loud which made Bala stop playing and look at me, my friends to gasp and look at me and everyone who heard to look at me as well. Basically everyone was looking at me... GAWD!!! The shame... wanted to crawl under the table, but realized it wouldn't have mattered. So there I was blushing furiously whilst Bala was like "Wooo... abit soprano right?" GAWD!!! Die somemore... but oh well... he continued singing and everyone forgot about the incident after awhile and its not like I dont' embaress myself often anyways, So it wasn't that big a deal!
After Waikiki and Bala's husky voice *shiver*, we went to Possums house to collect the other cars and as we passed the old school asrama, we fondly remembered the story about the asrama girls and I. We all cracked up laughing again. And thanks to the Possum we will never hear Kylie's "Chocolate" the same way again (more laughter). Yeah... was a good night for laughing and more laughing and even more laughing... my jaw actaully hurt.
I think it was the best dinner we had all had together. Sadly though that some of our extended group could not be there... oh well... maybe next time, yeah? It was one of those nights where you try to remember everything in detail so that you wouldnt' miss a thing. From the smells and tastes of the food and wine, the things we talked and joked about and of course the laughter that we shared and just the plain good old fun that we had. This time, dinner just seemed different, can't really put it into words. Perhaps it was one of those times where pressures of work and college and the like were left outside and we were blessed that everything seemed to be 'just right' that night.
CHEERS you guys. It was a wonderful night, may there be many more nights like this to come...
p.s: Thanks Possum for footing the bill too *hugs*
Wednesday, April 06, 2005
The day started rather early. Went to college only to find no one there and since the college is pretty crappy, I decided to go to my aunts house which was relatively near my college. There I got my first home cooked hot lunch in a long long time. Amen! My aunts maid and my grandma made sure I ate and then it was on to more studying and then I took a nap and played with my cousin for awhile (I think some kids are extorting her lunch money!) and then it was back to college for my psych class. The weather was pretty odd... rain than sunny sunshine and rain again and than sunny sunshine again... wierd! After college I went to office to collect stuff and then went home. It was about 6.30pm. After 3 cabs and 3 buses and alot of walking, I finally reached my house. Phew!
Possum and Possum's Sister came and picked me up for dinner as it was kong kong's birthday. A 10 course meal later and a late night chat with my folks, I sit here contemplating all the things I have to do this couple of days. It is exciting things but I am unable to savour the joys of work as I have done before. RUSHing! Thats all I have been doing. Doesn't help when my folks and Possum lays guilt on me that I don't spend enough time with them. Oh well... a juggler thats what I was probably in the past life. A juggler in a freak show carnival probably.
Monday, April 04, 2005
Both the Possum and I were just leaving the house, on our way for some yum yum mixed fruit meringue and drinks from Alexis in Bangsar (we were going to celebrate the Possum's birthday) when we saw the wonderous sights in the nights sky.
Sure the fireworks display (*it came from 1Utama phase 2, as they were celebrating thier one year anniversary) wasn't as magical and gorgeous as the photo but it was wonderful. Made me think back to the ones that we had during Merdeka at Ikano. Hope they have it again this year.
Anyways, Alexis as always was wonderful with Lattes and Whiskey Sours and of course the yummy yum yum mixed fruit meringue (a A+ recommendation). Had nasi lemak with chicken and serbuk as well as otak otak for supper whilst watching DVDs. Nice! It was so yum... (gawd I can hear the tummy making sounds again!)
The Pope has passed away (God bless his soul). Possums birthday is over (there goes my $$$). My editorial meeting with alcohol is done and the deadlines have been assigned and I want to really die. Conflicts with people are at an end (thank God!). My sheets have been changed (ahhh new sheets - love that feeling). The ants are moving house... leave please leave!!! Two friends of mine are currently seeing some new people, good luck with them *hugs*...
Arghh finally a new week has began and it looks as if I will not have time for fun and games though I really want that *sigh sigh sigh* I am not used to this but I have no choice. Atleast I got my groove back, eventhough it is a limp and wiggle here and there... hehehe... =)
Saturday, April 02, 2005
I will not give a damn to what other people say about me, regardless who they are. I suppose there is nothing one can do when they are called names of all sorts. I try to not step on anyones toes, but I guess I am not doing a good job, and to those whose toes I have stepped, I am sorry... whatever it was, it was unintentional.
I will not spend so much money on books and things related to arts and crafts. I have to remind myself constantly that I have no time to persue the arts and crafts at this moment in time and I have a whole pile of books to read.
I will not eat and sleep. I will not eat too much fatty foods which is basically all the yummy things which I love to eat... yums yums... *tummy rubbles already*
I will not go out so often as I hardly see my folks and I have a whole list of chores to do. This will also encourage me to study and save money. The less things you see the less things you buy and the more money I will have when I really 'need' to buy something.
I will try to be more patient towards others, namely the Possum and my folks as all of us are tired and stressed up after a hard day at work... so if I keep quit and be more patient with them, than we would not bicker and everyone will be happy.
I will try to smile eventhough my heart is breaking and I feel like crying.
I will try to see the brighter side to everything and stop being so sobbish and so negative. Remember rainbows after the storms and silver linings on them clouds.
I will try to learn how to cook for the betterment of myself and of course the Possums belly. (do you think thats sweet Possum?) - Possums nods his head eagerly.
I will try and study as hard as I can to achieve the goals that I have set for myself and to stop moaning about how much bloody work I have and to stop comparing myself to other peeps.
I will try to stop drinking so much alcohol as it is bad for my body and my wallet.
I will try to exercise and do some form of sports as I need to lose weight.
TRY is the keyword here, though I certainly hope to achieve everything listed here. Hopefully I will be able to...