After Awhile...

After awhile you learn the difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul,

And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning and company doesn't mean security.

And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't promises, and that sweet talk has no meaning but empty promises.

And you beging to accept your defeats with your head up

and your eyes open with the the grace of an adult and not the grief of a child.

And you learn to build your roads on today

because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans.

After awhile you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much.

So plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers... and you realise that somehow you can go on and that you are really strong...

*adapted from a 'Chicken Soup for The Teenage Soul'

~*~*~*~

On August 25th 1998, on a piece of pink Hello Kitty stationary, I wrote the following poem to Catherine one of my oldest and bestest friends. Several years later, Catherine returned the letter to me now folded into eight squares. I remember her telling me that I needed the letter more than she did at that point in time... a point in time that I have forgotten.

Now another several years later and I come across the letter again, a little more fragile but still in its pink glory. I read the words of my letter and realise how true the words still ring. How along the way I forgot to plant my own flowers in my now seemingly barren garden. I will remember now... I will begin my planting now... Spring has come again.