Mornings. I am still at home... going to go out for loaning with a friend later for the mag. Feeling alittle bit stressed out as there are so many things that I need to do today. Not sure I am going to juggle everything at once. Rush Rush... * Sigh * this is my fault for procrastinating as always. Anyways better get on moving with my day.
* I am still missing you...
Wednesday, December 29, 2004
Momentary Madness
There are times in your life when you are hit by Momentary Madness and for the life of you, you will never really comprehend or fully understand what has happened or why it has happened. For some they sit and ponder about that momentary moment of madness whilst others fake ignorance and hide under excuses that they create.
I am a victim of Momentary Madness. I love that feeling though, the feeling that grips you so suddenly that you don't know if you should stop or go forward, think or 'just do it'. The sad part about all this is that after that moment is gone, you are left an empty shell or perhaps just wondering 'why'? Left alone trying to make sense of what really happened and you wonder if you were possesed or if you were high on something... which in my case is neither. Then you start to see the cracks in life and the holes gapping at you thanks to you wonderful moment of madness which thankfully lasted awhile... and you think of all the things you have to do to make things better and how to heal the wounds that you inflicted on another (if there were anylah in the first place!)
Momentary Madness - it is a feeling I love and crave. That recklessness that comes to me every now and then. Just like a werewolf who sees the full moon, I too get that way though I am not sure what triggers me off. (that sounded alittle odd... ) Yet when alls said and done and sometimes before this Momentary Madness, I think about the consequences and wonder what will happen. Thats the part I hate. Yes, you can love and hate something at the same time. I have no regrets though, there is always a reason for ones behaviour and for things that happen. May you enjoy your own Momentary Madness, just remember that you can never take anything back once it is let free.
I am a victim of Momentary Madness. I love that feeling though, the feeling that grips you so suddenly that you don't know if you should stop or go forward, think or 'just do it'. The sad part about all this is that after that moment is gone, you are left an empty shell or perhaps just wondering 'why'? Left alone trying to make sense of what really happened and you wonder if you were possesed or if you were high on something... which in my case is neither. Then you start to see the cracks in life and the holes gapping at you thanks to you wonderful moment of madness which thankfully lasted awhile... and you think of all the things you have to do to make things better and how to heal the wounds that you inflicted on another (if there were anylah in the first place!)
Momentary Madness - it is a feeling I love and crave. That recklessness that comes to me every now and then. Just like a werewolf who sees the full moon, I too get that way though I am not sure what triggers me off. (that sounded alittle odd... ) Yet when alls said and done and sometimes before this Momentary Madness, I think about the consequences and wonder what will happen. Thats the part I hate. Yes, you can love and hate something at the same time. I have no regrets though, there is always a reason for ones behaviour and for things that happen. May you enjoy your own Momentary Madness, just remember that you can never take anything back once it is let free.
Guess whos back???
I have been missing from the blogging scene in awhile. I guess the main reason would be because once more, my computer has died on me (though thankfully I have a new PC and my modem and connections are up and running - praise God!) and my parents said they would eventually buy me a new computer which has happened.
Christmas has passed by so quickly and it has been a pleasant one with many interesting surprises for me. It was not a perfect Christmas, though I sometimes wonder what the word 'perfect' really connotates and if there is such a thing as 'perfect'. The New Year 2005 is around the corner and I am still rushing to finish up the things I wanted to do, though honestly I have done all that I wanted to do in the first place, which I have to say is a first for me. I mean since I knew what New Years resolutions were, I have made them though I have not successfully kept to them and accomplished them. Thats why for once in my life I have seen something through.
So much has happened this year that sometimes I wonder how time can pass me by so quickly. My internship at 17 is almost up and the New Year with all its new challenges are just coming up. Well, I cannot write too much at the moment, I have some things to write for the mag. For those of you who visit My Little Piece of Heaven often, thanks. Hope all of you are well and Merry Happy Christmas to all of you and Happy Blessed New Year. May all your wishes, hopes, dreams and prayers come true. * Hugs *
Mini Update:
Christmas has passed by so quickly and it has been a pleasant one with many interesting surprises for me. It was not a perfect Christmas, though I sometimes wonder what the word 'perfect' really connotates and if there is such a thing as 'perfect'. The New Year 2005 is around the corner and I am still rushing to finish up the things I wanted to do, though honestly I have done all that I wanted to do in the first place, which I have to say is a first for me. I mean since I knew what New Years resolutions were, I have made them though I have not successfully kept to them and accomplished them. Thats why for once in my life I have seen something through.
So much has happened this year that sometimes I wonder how time can pass me by so quickly. My internship at 17 is almost up and the New Year with all its new challenges are just coming up. Well, I cannot write too much at the moment, I have some things to write for the mag. For those of you who visit My Little Piece of Heaven often, thanks. Hope all of you are well and Merry Happy Christmas to all of you and Happy Blessed New Year. May all your wishes, hopes, dreams and prayers come true. * Hugs *
Mini Update:
- I was fortunate enough to go to Singapore for my first real holiday in ages. Honestly it was wonderful. The Christmas deco was up and everything was so wonderful. I went to the zoo (the night safari and the day zoo) and spent almost 8 hours there. The Malaysian Zoo is nothing like the Singapore Zoo sadly. Anyways, had a blast shopping for my arts and crafts things and met some really nice people there and had a lot of interesting adventures. This trip is one of those 'never-will-forget' type holidays and honestly it was all thanks for the Possum and partly my parents who did pay for part of the trip. Thanks you guys, it really meant a lot to me going for this holiday.
- Had my internship at 17 mag. Learnt alot of things during this time there and feel as if maybe there is a calling for me in this industry * wink wink * who knows? I will be finished at the end of this year and will miss all my friends there at the mag. It was fun working there though the pay was sucky (but I wanted to the experience, so it didn't matter that much to me!)
- My finals are over and as always I am anxiously waiting for the results but am not too worried about it. I was sick that day and have been sick pretty much on and off but am getting better. Oh yeah... got pimple outbreak now toos... ahhh... Pizza face.
- I have cut down on drinking, blogging (can you tell?), arts and crafts and and reading as I have no time. Hope to pick it all up next year.
- I have a new haircut and I think it makes me look younger like a kid. Someone said it looks like Ashlee Simpson but dont' want to be really associated with her with all that lip-syncing thing happening. I am the 'real thing' - Aight!
Anyways, I have to go now. It is late and I should be in bed. Hardly slept tonight. I am missing someone as I type this and I hope that person knows who I am refering too. If not, I am missing you anyways.
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